It Moves!

It is incomprehensible to me that there is a baby inside my wife. I mean, come on, lets be honest…its just not natural! Well, okay, that is not completely true, okay, I accept some people would say that it’s the most natural thing in the world, but it’s a person growing in another person – surely that can't be right?

Yesterday, my wife called me over and placed my hand on her bump, and I felt it move. Seeing the baby on the scan made it all seem incredibly real to me, but actually feeling it move was deeply bizarre. The correct reaction should have been to cry with joy, but I couldn’t help but think "its trying to get out!" It just doesn’t seem right!

In other baby news, I think my wife is beginning to get a little frustrated with me (I know, it seems impossible) Every time she has the slightest trip I cant help but look with great concern....at her stomach. It seems to me that carrying a child should be a male job. Something I am sure a lot of women would agree on! I feel like I should be busy protecting the baby, which is very difficult when it's in someone elses stomach. In honesty, I also feel rather jealous. After the baby is born I will have to go back to work; I cant afford to take paternity leave. My wife will breast feed, spend the day carrying the baby in a sling, bond with it. I will visit between work and sleep. I would love to be at home looking after it, and desperately want that closeness. People tell me that lots of men feel jealous of babies when they are born, feeling the loss of their wife’s attention. Me, I feel jealous of my wife, who will be able to spend more time with the baby than I will.

Yours as always,

An expectant and broken man