Rules, Ligaments, and Books

Perfect Parent

As a perfect parent, with a perfectly behaved child I found a conversation I had with a friend who is at bible collage today particularly funny. He complained to me about all the restrictive rules they have in place and informed me that one of them was no alcohol on site at all. He told me that he is a bit rebellious and drinks occasionally in his room with his friend.


What he had failed to realise is that the collage has done a very good job of “putting a fence around the law”. If the collage doesn’t want people to get drunk and rowdy throwing wild parties at the collage, they could create a rule that says “don’t get drunk”. This is open to a whole range of interpretations and some people would break it. Instead they have made the rule, don’t drink at all. Some people still have their act of rebellion and have the odd drink feeling pleased with themselves that they are breaking the rules, but they don’t actually break the rule the collage is really worried about. By putting up a rule in front of the rule they are worried about they create “a fence” as it’s referred to in Judaism.


It is this same method I intend to apply with my child. The rules I will set in place will be more ridge and stricter than I care about, so that when my child rebels (I know its unlikely) they can do so without doing anything to terrible.


I note that there have been some sceptics out there, some, mentioning no names, have questioned whether I will in fact be a perfect father, and whether in fact I will have a perfect child (the wife has ruled out the purchase of a baby grow that says on it “cuter than baby Jesus”). Some people – and I hesitate to even say this – say that babies often just cry! For no reason! That no matter how much you point out to them that this is in appropriate behaviour that they do so anyway. This thought has begun to concern me a little I will admit..but I am taking a firm stand. Denial is clearly the way forward.



Syndrome thingy what’s it ligaments.

For those who are following this bit of the story – and have asked questions about how the long suffering wife is coping – painfully. Nothing much more I can say on the subject.



Books for my course

I have got the first few books for my course through (I got a book grant! Wooo hooo!) and I note that one of the books, the set books, compulsory reading, was written by the tutor…now that is a clever move! A cynic (So clearly not me) might say that this was a cunning way to increase your book sales, however I am sure that the tutors book is the very best one available on the subject, how could it be less?


Yours as ever,


The perfectly broken man.

It's all about sex

I was asked the other day about why Christians go for the "no sex before marriage" thing, so I thought I would put up something about it.

Lots of the time, people believe that Christianity is all about rules; that Christianity sets out a list of things you can’t do that are designed to make you life worse. This is a bit of a bizarre belief when you actually look at Christian teaching. Let me give an example with a child. IF I was to tell my child that it shouldn’t put it's hand in a bowl of boiling water most people would accept that this “rule” was not from a deep desire for me to be controlling, but rather from a desire not to see my child burnt.

Contraception is a fairly new thing; the way we are wired is that when we have sex we may well get someone pregnant. So, Christians say, "look, if you are saying you are ready to bring a child into the world together, then really you are saying you are ready to make a lifelong commitment to each other." IF you have sex with someone you are not ready to have a child with then actually all the emotional connections etc still happen, and if that person gets pregnant there are going to be some fairly major issues. This really isn’t rocket science.

Part of the problem however is that Christians seem to be very afraid to actually talk about sex. I saw an article not to long ago in the Church Times, that said in a survey conducted loads of Christians said that using sex toys was fine, but none were prepared to say it openly. For the record, I really see no problem with sex toys at all. None. If people want to use toys to enhance their time in bed, on the sofa, on the living room floor – then why not? I believe we are made to enjoy sex, and I really don’t see why some people have such an issue with toys – however if anyone has a sensible reason why they are a problem then please do let me know...

That’s it. Nothing too interesting today – but I am still in pain. Other people's pain is the most boring type. My sister-in-law, when she has tooth ache or some such ailment, will inform me every few minutes that it still hurts...there is nothing I can do about it – I have done the “oh dear” thing – and I know you can’t help me but I do feel a compulsion to make sure that other people here me say “oh, that smarts” if for no other reason than in suffering the irritation of me going on about it you will be sharing a bit of my pain.

Yours as ever,

The Broken Man