Thursday, 24 July 2008

A Bumpy Ride

I got home the other day to find my wife in tears as she had seen herself in a full length mirror and come to the conclusion that she looked terrible. She believed that the bump was not a neat little bump, but a huge ugly bump, that her bum is increasing in size at an alarming rate too and that the dress she picked up from a discount store looks like a tent.

I think my wife looks incredible. When I look at her and see the “bump” my thoughts are mostly “WOW, my baby is in there” (okay, I know I should think “our” baby but I don’t, my thoughts are self centred!).

My wife looks incredible – I just really wish people would tell her that, instead of saying “WOW, that bump’s big - sure it’s not twins?”. Yes, we are sure it’s not twins, yes the bump is big, as she has a small frame.

I should mention that my wife suffered from anorexia for a long time; she still, many years on, only eats at meal times. Having found a system that works and keeps her healthy, she sticks with it. A rapidly changing body shape was never going to be easy for her, but I just want to slap people (with a brick) who try and make funny comments about her expanding stomach.

Yours as ever,

The Broken Man
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4 comments:

Fran said...

Many prayers for your wife, your baby and you.

Body image... oh my.

God have mercy on us all, pour out your great love upon us, especially this beautiful mother to be. May she come to welcome and love all the changes in her body as Your love made manifest.

Amen.

24 July 2008 at 10:44
Kate said...

It is really hard to se your body change, even though you know it's for a good cause. I'm sure she looks great, as you say. I'll be thinking of her.

24 July 2008 at 15:12
TeacherMommy said...

This may sound backwards but I actually find that bad self-image comes from being too self-centered. If you aren't thinking about yourself at all, you aren't judging yourself.

I've struggled with it for a long time, but whenever it really starts to bother me I realize that at the root it's self-centered and doesn't matter. I may feel like people are judging me but, in reality they aren't even thinking about me as much as all that. They got their own lives to live too. And though it's easy to look at others and compare, that is also just envy so...not helpful!

I know there is probably no nice way to say any of that to your wife, but that's all I've got. LOL.

Thanks for your comment. I'm glad you found the list useful.

25 July 2008 at 05:55
daysease said...

ooh, i know that sentiment, though i have not suffered with anorexia. i love food and have issues maintaining a good healthy balance, but may God help her to see herself as He sees her. and to see that the changes that come with child carrying and bearing and birthing add a different sort of beauty. not better, not worse, just different. My husband has to reassure me ALL the time that the extra fluff at my sides and around are lovely to him because they are his to enjoy. maybe keep reassuring her that you are so pleased with how she is because she is yours. encourage her to fix her thoughts on Philippians 4 where it talks about "think on these things..." As she fills her thoughts on thanksgiving, gratefulness, and good things, there will be less room to focus on the things that get her down. and this comes from a professional- negative -feeler being changed by God. by the way, sorry to intrude on your blog... hope you all have a great day.

6 August 2008 at 09:42

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