We have just had a baby scan. I know what I am meant to say here. I know the rules of this game, and I know there are some women reading this, and I don’t want to get in trouble so..
"WOW its just so incredible to see my baby! I can't begin to tell you how exciting it was to see my baby…" Okay, you can stop reading now. Leave it right there and everyone will be happy.
The first scan was incredibly exciting, and was really clear, and I did feel all those incredible emotions. The second one was a few weeks later, and wasn’t such a big deal as we had been for the emergency scan already, and in honesty the second scan wasn’t as clear as the first one.
This one – well to be honest there was lots of searching around and “we” had decided not to find out the baby's gender (I am sure I have talked about that so won't go on about it again). So for me, as that was something they could look for and were not, its like being told; "here is something really exciting (okay, okay, someone) but you don’t get to know the exciting bit yet – the surprise bit – and you don’t get to play with it yet." Please don’t hate me – I was bored.
It's not that I am not excited about having a baby, I really, really am. It's just that, well, an odd medical image which looks like an x-ray on a monitor just didn’t make my heart flutter. I know I should have been wiping a tear away from my eye, but in all honesty I was fighting the urge to pick up my book. Okay, this makes me a terrible person, I know that, I suspect particuarly mothers, expectant and those already with children will be thinking; “OH, he is one of those men”, but I thought it worth posting the unvarnished truth, as I have a suspicion (okay, a hope) that I am not alone in this...
Yours as ever,
The Broken Man
"WOW its just so incredible to see my baby! I can't begin to tell you how exciting it was to see my baby…" Okay, you can stop reading now. Leave it right there and everyone will be happy.
The first scan was incredibly exciting, and was really clear, and I did feel all those incredible emotions. The second one was a few weeks later, and wasn’t such a big deal as we had been for the emergency scan already, and in honesty the second scan wasn’t as clear as the first one.
This one – well to be honest there was lots of searching around and “we” had decided not to find out the baby's gender (I am sure I have talked about that so won't go on about it again). So for me, as that was something they could look for and were not, its like being told; "here is something really exciting (okay, okay, someone) but you don’t get to know the exciting bit yet – the surprise bit – and you don’t get to play with it yet." Please don’t hate me – I was bored.
It's not that I am not excited about having a baby, I really, really am. It's just that, well, an odd medical image which looks like an x-ray on a monitor just didn’t make my heart flutter. I know I should have been wiping a tear away from my eye, but in all honesty I was fighting the urge to pick up my book. Okay, this makes me a terrible person, I know that, I suspect particuarly mothers, expectant and those already with children will be thinking; “OH, he is one of those men”, but I thought it worth posting the unvarnished truth, as I have a suspicion (okay, a hope) that I am not alone in this...
Yours as ever,
The Broken Man
16 comments:
Not to concern yourself with the whims of readers as to the gender of your newly developing baby. Those tears will come at the time of arrival.
HA this made me chuckle a bit - it was hubby cooing and getting excited and me going, "yeah I know it's a baby, it's kicking me - can we go now?"
We're not having any scans this time. :)
Sarah
i had to think very hard about how i could get excited about the scans myself, and i'm a motehr of two!
You must be a bit excited as you're going to post the scans! Whatever you say!
Well I still freak about the ultrasounds...I love them lol. But I still kinda know how you feel. Cause my last one was sooo grainy I could barely make out a thing so no I didn't get those flutters either. Hopefully the next one will be better.
Don't worry about what others say. Your excitiment about the baby shows!:o)
I tried to put you on my blog roll but another blog kept coming up.???
HAve a great day and relaxing wk.end!
Blessins',Lib
Eh, ultrasounds are hit or miss I think - due to health insurance issues I only had one and I remember it being uncomfortable and not terribly exciting. A lot of squinting and "I'll take your word for it." And I'm a woman, so that's really saying something - don't worry, holding the baby will be earth shatteringly exciting - the real thing holds no comparison to looking at a sort of picture on a low quality monitor.
I think my husband felt the same way. We ended up having a 3/d one with my son and you could see more clearly. I know he thought that one was cool, but not as much as I did. His "moment" came when he saw the baby for the first time!
*** I thought they should have had a Jane Austen quiz for the guys:)
I know what you mean some scan you can't see very much and, don't be so hard on your self the very fact that you are at the scan says you are excited!
when I had my 1st baby it was 1982
and the scan where really bad back then and I so wanted to know what the baby was and back then they could not to well :(
years later 2001 I had my 2nd child and they could see very clearly what it was he was very proud to show us. the 2nd tiem of course I wanted to know I was soooo... happy I was going to be having a son b/c I had alredy had a daughter that was 18 at the time and was so embrass that I was having another baby she kept saying "mom you are carzy" marina
I get it! When first I saw the scan for my oldest daughter,I didn't know what was what. (29.5 years ago). Circumstances were dire so I was in no state to have excitement. I remember seeing my grand daughter Makayla in an ultra sound just days after we learned our 19 year old unmarried daughter was expecting in 3 months. She appeared to be playing peek a boo. My heart melted and I knew unlimited joy. She still blesses our days. I've seen the 4d ultrasound and those take my breath away. You are a good person. Don't worry. Glad you resisted picking up that book.
The experience, the emotion, the uncomfortable feelings, the fantastic feelings, the 'getting fat', the wonder and surprise of every moment of the pregnacy is just so different between a man and a woman....Nobody (well I wouldn't) expects you to jump and do cartwheels over a scan....but when that baby comes..ohhhhhh the emotion then, I so look forward to hearing about that!
We are all unique beings with unique feelings, actions and reactions. Never feel bad because you don't have a "typical" reaction.
When I was pregnant with my first child, I kept waiting for the "I love this baby more than I knew was possible" feeling because thats what other mothers-to-be seemed to feel. I worried about my lack of feelings for the child I was carrying. Right up until the day he was born I was afraid there was something missing in me.
BUT, the minute he was born I was flooded with unbelievable love for this baby and didn't stop crying with joy for days.
What you feel is what you feel and thats ok. :)
You were brave to share with us.
Absolutely with you on this one.
J
I've had 6 kids, and I can never figure out those scans. "Here's the head!" they say, pointing at a blob. Okay, if you say so...
the further along you go in the pregnancy, the less you can see since it is tighter in there with less room to actually view things. the good news... baby is getting bigger and is preparing to see YOU!!! We did not find out the gender of our first, and it was fun that way. though, after that i NEEDED to know to be prepared. The first as a surprise really is wonderful. My hubby did the same thing (reacted the same way), and in the end, he was overwhelmed with joy (literally) when he saw our first son's birth. boy or girl, God has a plan for this little person he used you and your wife to create, that in itself must get you a little exited. Jeremiah 29:11 blessings! for a healthy baby and in this day that the Lord has made...
I had a hematoma early on, so I had the privilege of getting about 10 scans during my pregnancy. Each one was awesome to me! I loved watching Ham dance, wave, stick her tongue out, do flips, you name it. I am sure I'll get excited when we have another baby, too. It's just too cool...to me.
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